I’ve had a string of bad luck these past couple of weeks…
Last Friday, someone backed into my car in my office parking lot, causing some real damage.
A couple of days later, I went to pick up a drug prescription at CVS and was erroneously told I had no insurance coverage.
Yesterday, I was notified by PayPal that my credit card may have been compromised.
And this morning, while reaching for my toothbrush, I knocked a glass into the bathroom sink, causing it to literally explode. The glass, I mean (see photo).
So here’s my question for you: Are these unlucky things related?
(Full disclosure, I did break a mirror over a black cat while walking under a ladder with an open umbrella inside the house the other day.)
I’m confident the answer is no. Because while the temptation is there to construct a story when chance events occur close together, sometimes random is just random. There is no story to tell.
But true or not, when you work by yourself, the urge to make up stories is especially strong.
With no one sitting next to you to talk you off the ledge, and with your company’s smallness making you particularly sensitive to every win or loss, it can be hard to think clearly when things are not going as you might like:
That prospect is taking too long to respond… I must have priced it too high.
My client sent me an unfriendly email … they are about to fire me.
Things are slow … I have no business working for myself.
I forgot her birthday … my wife is really mad (that one may be true).
If this describes the hole you occasionally dig for yourself, I have a few suggestions…
#1. Tell a Better Story
I used to have a business coach who had one simple rule: before she would help me work through a problem, I had to come up with five alternate scenarios for its cause:
That prospect is taking too long to respond… they had a family medical emergency; they never received my follow-up email; they are waiting for a check to clear so they can pay my deposit; etc.
Her point was simple. If you’re going to make things up, you may as well make up some good things, too.
And while what we believe is happening has no effect on reality (I think), simply brainstorming other possibilities changes your outlook and takes down the temperature.
#2. Expand Your Definition of Success
A lack of visible progress doesn’t mean nothing is happening in the background.
As with exercise, there is often a lot of time and work involved in marketing before you see tangible results – and the results are not evenly distributed over time. So if your only definition of success is “new clients,” you’ll have a lot of disappointing days.
That’s why I track, on a weekly basis, my core business building activities: calls, lunches, emails, coffees, live events, and newsletters published.
When you expand your definition of success to include things about which you have complete control, you stay motivated to keep doing what needs doing. And if you do that, the clients keep showing up.
#3. Give Yourself Some Credit
The truth is, sometimes the bad omens are, in fact, real. The prospect says no, the client leaves, you really did forget your wife’s birthday.
But that’s just the price of admission and the more times you experience things going wrong, the less of a big deal it is.
Besides, unlike many people who decided to play it safe, you’re in the game, you showed up. And win or lose, that’s a lot better than hiding in your cubicle wondering when the next layoff is coming.
So don’t forget to congratulate yourself; you are doing what so many other people are too afraid to do.
Here’s the bottom line.
Working by yourself is great, but it comes with a tendency to jump to conclusions and make up stories that have little basis in reality.
As Stevie Wonder famously sang,
When you believe in things,
That you don’t understand,
Then you suffer,
Superstition aint the way
Regards to your wife.
Extra Credit:
In exactly 15 words, and in the style of Dr. Suess,
summarize today’s newsletter (no AI please!).
Share your answer below…
Once upon a time, a solo made up a story; rinse and repeat till cheery!
Well done!
It’s certainly true
You have bad luck
But it’s up to you
To give a….poop:)
By the way, great newsletter today. I actually needed it!
I’m glad it hit the spot!
A story’s a story whoever speaks it.
The story’s effect comes when someone repeats it!
Now that sounds very Dr. Seuss-ish!!
I’ve read so much Dr Seuss to my kids I have some of them memorized!
What do you say
Without anyone to play?
Tis best to believe
But not deceive
Extra credit to you for use of the word “Tis.”
Success is a process
Efforts are tracked
Give yourself credit
And you’ll never go back!
Haha, love that!
Stories from a desk
can become a mess.
Make them good,
as strong businesses would!
Well done.
“A sham I am said nasty thought Sam, don’t buy in, and bam goes Sam”
Thanks a lot, now I’ll talk Suess all day.
Haha, believe me, I’ve been doing the same reading these!!
I’m no Dr. Seuss
But a penguin fan I be
ave we reached 15 words yet?
Close enough!
There is a reason those mishaps occurred… it’s so you’ll have fodder for newsletter words.
Ooo, very slick.
Cool down paranoia
and lower the bar
put rose-colored glasses
you’re already a star!
Very Suessian!
Mr. Katz,
Don’t fear
God doesn’t put any more on us then we can bear!
Extra credit for calling me Mr. Katz!
Yaay
Do the usual, track what you do, pat yourself in the back, you’re living!
Nicely done!
Forget superstition
Bad luck is not catchin’
Think good things instead
In your head head
Fantastic!
To know better is to be better and your newsletters always helps make me better